Hello friends,
My sister Dana and her friend Beth came into town from Richmond the other day. I drove up to Bartlesville, where they were staying with my folks, and brought them back to the big city. Dana and Beth, being a couple of hayseeds from Virgina, had never been to a casino before, and I, always looking for an excuse, offered to take them to that new, fancy shmancy saw dust joint on the south end of town. Shadow River or Silver Creek or Slippy Lagoon or something along them lines, Casino. I was very impressed. I think the people running the place were happy it met my approval. Now, my players club cards at other casinos all read Douglas Wells, but you guys all know I go by my middle name, Eddy (Edward) . So when I got my players club card at Squirtin' Stream Casino I told the lady that was fixin' me up that I didn't go by Douglas. She said OK, what do you go by. Now friends, I wanted to say Eddy, I had every intention of saying Eddy, but what came out of my mouth was....Jocko. So my card reads 'Jocko Wells'. Jocko??? Don't ask me. It was funny to here the page over the whole casino, JOCKO WELLS, YOU SEAT IS READY AT THE 2/5 NO LIMIT TABLE, JOCKO WELLS. I did teach Dana how to turn 3 Kings and 130 dollars into a big egg (0). She was impressed. The buffet was pretty good. Dana and Beth paid for it which made it even better. Now friends, don't hold this against me, but Dana and Beth were playing the penny slots. I know, it was embarrassing, How could any sister of mine play penny slots? That ain't gambling, that's waisting your time. Hell, it wasn't even a slot machine, it was some under the sea, fancy fishin' game. I couldn't figure out what the hell was goin' on with the damn thing. She would have...say...230 credits, hit the button and the wheels would start spinning (and there must have been 7 of them) They would stop on...say...a red fish, a blue fish, a dumb ol' turtle, another blue fish, a yellow fish, some crusty ol' crab, and a slimy hunk of kelp. Lights would ring and bells would flash, lines would shoot all over the screen, the bonus sign would blink, the yellow fish would turn into the word 'WILD'. Then the blue fish jumps into the fish bowl so you gotta pick a can. The whole time this is going on, the most God awful lounge music is playing over and over and over and over and over. This lasted for about 20 minutes. When all the commotion stopped, I looked up to see how big the fortune was that she just won and the sign said 222 credits. ??? Some how she lost 8 cents. But I will say, it was at least a 45 cent production. Call me crazy, but sometimes it seems like the odds are all in the casinos favor.
Here's one for the suckers.
http://s12.photobucket.com/albums/a221/rah6460/?action=view¤t=PICT7247.flv
VIVA!
Adios,
~e~
My sister Dana and her friend Beth came into town from Richmond the other day. I drove up to Bartlesville, where they were staying with my folks, and brought them back to the big city. Dana and Beth, being a couple of hayseeds from Virgina, had never been to a casino before, and I, always looking for an excuse, offered to take them to that new, fancy shmancy saw dust joint on the south end of town. Shadow River or Silver Creek or Slippy Lagoon or something along them lines, Casino. I was very impressed. I think the people running the place were happy it met my approval. Now, my players club cards at other casinos all read Douglas Wells, but you guys all know I go by my middle name, Eddy (Edward) . So when I got my players club card at Squirtin' Stream Casino I told the lady that was fixin' me up that I didn't go by Douglas. She said OK, what do you go by. Now friends, I wanted to say Eddy, I had every intention of saying Eddy, but what came out of my mouth was....Jocko. So my card reads 'Jocko Wells'. Jocko??? Don't ask me. It was funny to here the page over the whole casino, JOCKO WELLS, YOU SEAT IS READY AT THE 2/5 NO LIMIT TABLE, JOCKO WELLS. I did teach Dana how to turn 3 Kings and 130 dollars into a big egg (0). She was impressed. The buffet was pretty good. Dana and Beth paid for it which made it even better. Now friends, don't hold this against me, but Dana and Beth were playing the penny slots. I know, it was embarrassing, How could any sister of mine play penny slots? That ain't gambling, that's waisting your time. Hell, it wasn't even a slot machine, it was some under the sea, fancy fishin' game. I couldn't figure out what the hell was goin' on with the damn thing. She would have...say...230 credits, hit the button and the wheels would start spinning (and there must have been 7 of them) They would stop on...say...a red fish, a blue fish, a dumb ol' turtle, another blue fish, a yellow fish, some crusty ol' crab, and a slimy hunk of kelp. Lights would ring and bells would flash, lines would shoot all over the screen, the bonus sign would blink, the yellow fish would turn into the word 'WILD'. Then the blue fish jumps into the fish bowl so you gotta pick a can. The whole time this is going on, the most God awful lounge music is playing over and over and over and over and over. This lasted for about 20 minutes. When all the commotion stopped, I looked up to see how big the fortune was that she just won and the sign said 222 credits. ??? Some how she lost 8 cents. But I will say, it was at least a 45 cent production. Call me crazy, but sometimes it seems like the odds are all in the casinos favor.
Here's one for the suckers.
http://s12.photobucket.com/albums/a221/rah6460/?action=view¤t=PICT7247.flv
VIVA!
Adios,
~e~
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