The Ramones vs Styx, Journey, and REO

Hello friends,

When I was in high school my friends usta give me a hard time about being a Ramones fan. They would joke about how weird Joey looked and would imitate the 1-2-3-4 count like Corky from 'Life Goes On' was calling it out. Now, they were listening to sorry crap like Styx, Journey, and REO Speedwagon. For some stupid reason they thought that was good music. See, the corporate big shots brain washed their tiny pea brains in the 'tiny pea brain, brain washing conspiracy of the 1970's' conspiracy back in the 70's. They couldn't help it cause they got tiny pea brains. Anyway, now that time has passed and I can look back, I can see just how tiny their brains actually were and how I had super future X-ray vision for cool junk. It was obvious to me cause The Ramones didn't have kinky perms or write a song about their hair dresser Mr. Roberto like that girl singer for Styx did (That is a true story about the song Mr. Roboto. How sick and sad is that?) The Ramones didn't cancel a gazillion shows cause their throats were sore like that girl singer for Journey did(The Ramones played 2,263 shows, roughly as many as The Grateful Dead) The Ramones didn't wear tight spandex pants on their big fat asses like that girl guitar player for REO did (The Ramones wore jeans with holes in the knees) The Ramones didn't play state fairs, revival shows, or the Wind Jammer in East Tulsa like those three slugs. The Ramones didn't have some stupid band name that some num-skull thought sounded cool, like Boston, Foreigner, or Supertramp (The Ramones got the band name from a story that Paul McCartney called himself Paul Ramone when the Beatles were playing the bars in Hamburg, Germany before they were famous. See, that way some young fraulein couldn't track him down if he knocked her up. That's why they all took the last name Ramone as well) A few years back some one decided to put together a Ramones tribute album and the likes of U2, Pearl Jam, Kiss, Metallica, Marylin Manson, The Red Hot Chile Peppers, Foo Fighters, Rancid, Green Day, The Offspring, Rob Zombie, Garbage, The Pretenders, and Tom Waits all recorded songs for it. Hell, Joey Ramone has a street named after him in New York City, and the nations largest metropolis celebrated Joey Ramone day ta-boot. That's a little different than having a dirt road named after you and a wing-dig that evening in Afton or Pawhuska. The Ramones raised several hundred thousand dollars for the 911 families, did benefits for the homeless, and even gave money to by Kevlar for the New York City Police Department. The Ramones were inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame on their first ballot in 2002. Those other three bands haven't even been nominated.

Just because a singer has a 6 octave voice or a guitar player can run scales up and down the neck of his guitar to beat the band, doesn't mean their any good. As a friend of mine said to some jack ass who was bashing the Ramones "Rock and roll isn't about great musicians, it's about great music." Well said, friend. He wasn't one of my tiny pea brained friends.








Adios,
~e~

Where Have All The Little Monkey Kisses Gone?

Hello friends,

How do people fall in love? I mean, what is it inside us that makes us have that 'goofy way you feel' feeling for another person? Is it some kind of endorphin that makes you happy when you see that person walk in to the room? What causes you to get that weird, spongy sensation in your stomach when that special person smiles at you? And I mean that smile where you know they are feeling the same way you are. What makes you dizzy when you have been in Louisiana doing hurricane Katrina clean up and on the return trip home the bus carrying the volunteers breaks down at 2:30 in the morning just 30 miles south of Tulsa and when she comes to pick you up she gets out of the car and runs to you and jumps in your arms and raps her legs around your waist then gives you a million little monkey kisses all over your face on the side of the highway as the semi trucks roar by? Could it be a chemical imbalance that makes you feel that way for that certain someone and not feel that way for someone else?

So, after going throw all of that malarkey, how do some people wind up losing that feeling for one another? Do those little electrical sparks stop jumping around your brain after a while? How do things that usta make them laugh, all of a sudden make them mad? How does a hero turn into a villain? How do monkey kisses turn in to kicks in the balls? (metaphorically speaking) Now to begin with, the answers to these questions are not the answers I'm really looking for. But you see, you have to answer those questions, to get to the question that I want the answer to. What I really want to know is, how does a wonderful, skipping through the daisies, dancing on a star, kind of love some how turn in to hating my stupid guts?

'The wind of fate has pried us loose..'

Adios,
~e~